Book Review: Never Split The Difference
Learning new negotiation tactics
Week 2 of being in lockdown and I don't know about you... but I'm tired of my screen. I'm looking at screens all day, every day. Even social times are screens with Zoom parties and work out times are YouTube videos. To give myself a screen timeout, I've been retreating back into my world of books (ok fine, I have a Kindle but it's better for you than a normal screen!) and good old pen and paper. A friend (thanks, Eden!) recommended me a book on negotiation tactics: Never Split The Difference by Chris Voss, a former FBI hostage negotiator. I thought that I would share my visual notes and a couple of key things that stood out to me:
(Don’t judge my freehand non-symmetrical attempt at a stop sign! >_<)
1) No starts the negotiation
The most powerful thing that the book did for me was to reframe what "no" meant. I've typically perceived "no" in a negotiation as the worst and key thing to avoid. "No" to me used to mean the end of the negotiation or that I have failed. Instead, Voss says that "no” actually means the start to the negotiation and that it's actually an opening to truly listen and understand what the other party needs. "No" starts conversations and creates safe havens to get to the final "yes" of commitment. Good negotiation welcomes and even invites a solid "no" to start, giving the other party the feeling of safety, security, and control. It's a sign that the other party is engaged.
2) Ackerman Model
I've been looking for a methodology for bargaining and Voss shares a method called the Ackerman model which works both ways (bargaining someone up or down). It works like this:
Set your target price (say you want to buy a used car at $10,000).
Set your first offer at 65% of the target price (Offer $6,500 for the car)
Continue to negotiate in decreasing increments as you go back and forth: 85, 95, and finally 100%.
When offering the final amount, ideally use odd and non-round numbers like $9,985 rather than $10,000. It gives the number more credibility and weight.
On the final number, throw in a non-monetary item to show you're at your limit.
The reverse works too if you're selling something: set your asking price of 135% of what you want, then negotiate down to 115, 105 and finally 100% which is your target price.
3) The Power of Anchoring
One of my favourite negotiation tactics that I like to use is anchoring, a cognitive bias that is the tendency to give too much weight to the first number put forth in a discussion and then adjust from that starting point, the "anchor". For example, the $6,500 that I have shared in my previous example would be the “anchor” in that used car negotiation. If the other party had first offered $15,000, that number would be the “anchor”.
Voss has shown me how to refine my anchoring technique and some of the tips are below:
Let the other party set the anchor - if it's too off from yours, don't let it bias you and be clear on what your target price is. Don’t negotiate off their starting point.
If you're setting the price, anchor the other party's emotions first. Play to their loss aversion biases and articulate the importance of the opportunity and value.
Then share a range to soften the ask.
Pivot to non-monetary terms to make sure that the other party sees all the benefits other than price, ideally summarizing the benefits.
Then come back to price and give a number (refer to Ackerman model).
I loved the idea of anchoring both emotion and price. Anchoring emotions allows for the other party to be more open and sets the right stage for a pricing discussion. Used with the Ackerman model, the combination of both can be pretty powerful to get to the desired target.
Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the read and the visual notes have allowed me to reflect on how this would change my tactics for future negotiations. I like it when books challenge some pre-set assumptions I have about a topic and show me a different way of thinking. For that, I rate the book 8/10! :)
I hope to share more of my visual notes and takeaways in the future, and if you have any book recommendations, I'm always looking for good reads!
Things That Caught My Eye
Conference call in real life (video) - oldie but SUCH a goodie. Totally worth the watch.
COVID-19 volunteering opportunities for tech, data and gov't professionals - U.S. Digital Response Team
By far my favorite negotiating book! My mind was blown by “use what/how questions not ‘why’ questions”. People are WAY less defensive when you don’t use why. It was an instant game changer for me.